JACK OF ALL… ANXIETY ATTACKS
Why You Should Stop Stressing and Hire Someone to Do Things for You
I’m one of those people that has trouble letting others do things that I feel I can do myself. Not to brag [but definitely to brag] I know how to do a good bit of random things.
I can reupholster furniture, make pillows, write scripts, braid hair, crochet blankets, cut hair, edit videos… you get it.
So when it comes time for me to do something that requires various skills, I generally refuse to delegate. I feel like I can get on youtube and figure it out myself. For me, and most of the other control freaks like me, there are a few reasons why we don’t relinquish any responsibilities;
We have trouble believing other people can manifest our vision
We suck at communication and don’t want to risk any mishaps
We’re cheap and don’t want to spend money on things we believe we can do ourselves
We haven’t networked well enough to identify other professionals we can trust
While all of these reasons are valid, none of them are helpful. All they do is add bullet points to your to-do list, increase your level of resistance on starting your project, and give you another reason to struggle falling asleep at night.
As control freaks, we want to get things done and we want them to be done at a certain level of professionalism. And due to the four reasons listed above, we’ve decided to do them ourselves. I can’t vouch for everyone, but I know this is what happens when I try to be Miss. I-know-how-to-do-everything-because-I’m-smarter-than-everyone. I wind up having some degree of an anxiety attack.
If you’d like an example, here it goes… STORY TIME.
So my husband’s family and my family go on a trip every summer to the beach. We decided we wanted to get family pictures taken this year. (Actually my husband decided and delegated the whole project to me). Then I acknowledged my inability to learn professional photography in a week, and actually outsourced to a guy we met on Facebook.
** His name is Lo Scott with Scott’s Design Photography and he’s very talented***
Despite my ability to outsource the photography, I did not outsource the hair styling. [Because my mom’s a hair stylist and taught me since I was a kid so I rarely can admit when I don’t know what I’m doing]. I was going for this cute 70s look with my purple afro and a white shirt with hanging tassels. I did my own hair and my own makeup. When we started to take the photos, the wind blew as hard as it could without causing a hurricane and my hair was in my eyes, my mouth, & my nose.
I couldn’t get it back to that cute circular look it had before and I felt like I looked like a whole crazy hot mess. Everyone was handing me hair bands trying to do damage control but it was too late. I was already mad and sad and about to cry… not to mention I was pregnant and REALLY needed to feel cute. So basically I had a little meltdown and nearly cried on the beach.
~ Even still, we managed to get some really nice photos~
SCOTT’S DESIGN PHOTOGRAPHY
This experience is one of the many, many examples where I didn’t ask someone to do what they do best and help me out. If I would have gotten someone to style my hair to withstand the unexpected wind attack, I could have spared my peace of mind.
Not only is my peace of mind a very valuable commodity that’s often in limited supply, so is my time. You may not care about preventing yourself from having an emotional meltdown after you force yourself to learn something you’re not technically very good at, but one thing that is indisputable is your lack of unlimited time.
Whether you work for an established company or you’re an entrepreneur, we all have the same limited 24 hours in a day. The truth is, you simply don’t have the time to be a jack of all trades and do everything that ever needed to be done for anything. On top of that, you definitely don’t have the ability to do these things to the high quality necessary to keep the control freak in you at bay. You’ve been honing your crafts for years, putting blood sweat and tears into it. So why would it make sense for you to be able to do someone else’s craft as well as they do when you commit so little time to perfecting it?
Short answer… it doesn’t make any sense. Let people do what they do best!
There are a whole lot of talented people in this world who have been honing their skills and perfecting their craft for years. They know the ins and outs. The shortcuts. The setbacks. They have connections that you may never be able to acquire. And most of the time… they love doing it.
I LOATHE networking with random strangers. I’m a recovering socially awkward introvert and barely even like leaving my house. So I've learned to outsource in-person networking to my husband. He’s a social butterfly. It’s quite possible that he’s never made an enemy in his life because people just love him. He loves making people laugh and starting random conversations with strangers so that he can pick their brains.
I have RBF (Resting Bitch Face) and often look like a serial killer… If black female serial killers existed.
So when I go out and need to meet people and find out what’s going on in my community, I bring my husband. He has been honing his craft of being extroverted and pleasant to be around since childhood. Who am I to try and steal his shine?
My networking Liaison…
This brings me to my final point. I’m a writer. I spent a few grand learning how to screenwrite from professors at UCLA. I endured a few verbal beatings from a producer who shall remain nameless. (Who I recently realized had some very solid points on one of my screenplays). I wrote & read during work hours at my engineering jobs and risked getting in trouble. I attended writer’s workshops with older people that thought I should write novels instead of screenplays (and who wouldn’t let me forget it). I did all of this because I love writing.
I continue to hone my skills so that I can carry the load and prevent people from having jack-of-all-trades induced anxiety attacks. So when you realize how long it’s been since you made a blog post on your website or updated your landing page, remember that there is someone out there who can do it for you. There’s no need for you to bash in your keyboard or throw your drink at the wall… you can reach out to Hush Girl Productions for your copywriting and story cultivation needs. We got you.